3 months old

My baby is 3 months old.  He's no longer considered a "newborn", he's now officially and infant.  I've looked up 3 month milestones and he has hit all of them.  Actually, he's gotten all expected 4 month milestones down as well.  My precious little boy.

We've had a few big steps.  I had to start back to work this week, Thursday.  

Liam is as stubborn as I am so of course he decided a few weeks ago that he was going to have nothing to do with a bottle.  We tried warm milk, cold milk, freshly expressed milk, warming nipples, 5 different bottles, and having me leave the house.  Thursday morning came and all I could do was I hope and pray that he would decide that it was OK to take a bottle from the babysitter.

No dice. 

This is how it went- 

Day 1- I cried on the way to the baby sitters.  I cried on my way to work.  I cried at work. (Thankfully my first day of work was a half day).  My baby who usually eats every 2 hours ate at 6:30 AM then refused all bottles. He waited for momma to get home at 1:00.  He was exhausted from crying and hungry when I picked him up.  I cried.  I cried that I was starving him.  I cried that I was hurting my baby and there was nothing I could do to help him.  I fell asleep crying.

Day 2- I cried leaving him.  I cried UGLY tears.  I sobbed because I knew how hungry he would be if he didn't eat.  BUT.... come10:30 AM I got the best text message ever.  Liam took a bottle.  He was hungry and must have known that it would be a looooong time before he got to eat.  Granted, he ate only 5 ounces the entire day when he'd usually eat 20, but he ate.  Yay.  Now come Monday, I will cry.  But it won't be because of my starving baby, it will be because I miss my baby.

Going back to work is the hardest thing ever.  I never thought I would want to stay at home, but I do.  I don't want to miss a second with my little guy.  I don't wanna.  WAAAAH!

Here he is:  3 months old today.

Liam's Gray and Teal ( and Orange) Nursery

I love my son's nursery.  Initially, I wanted to make it an "owl" nursery but the owls ended up just blending into the room and not becoming a "focal point" per se.  His colors were gray and teal with white accents but I decided I also wanted a "pop" of orange.  Here's what I ended up with.  Like I said- I love it!  The pictures don't do it justice.

My dad made the stump table from a tree the had on the ranch. My husband and I designed and made the shelving.  My husband and father in law installed the crown molding.  I recovered my sister's navy blue glider.

The rug is from Urban Outfitters (orange zig zag rug) the tree decal is from Etsy (tree decal)

I would like to say that the rug is more of a dull orange than a bright orange.  It also came with a funky smell.  I had to put it outside for days and spray it down with tons of febreeze.

I made the crib bedding and bed skirt.  My husband and I made the abacus based off Anything Pretty's tutorial (abacus).  The curtains are from Z gallerie (mimosa curtain) but I'm not sure they still make them in aquamarine.

My sister and I made the birds for this mobile and my husband I  spent a few hours balancing birds and branches! (Design Sponge Mobile DIY)

The cubes are from Target though I couldn't find an orange one so my sister covered  it for me.   The lamp, which you can't see well from this terrible photo is actually a white tree stump.  It's from Target too.  (tree lamp) though I can't find an original link.

Here's more "artsy" photos.  Taken at my baby shower by my co-worker's daughter, Kati.  She's a better photographer than I am!

Breastfeeding: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

I wanted to post something about breastfeeding because I'm pretty proud to be doing it.  I have no experience with formula feeding so I can't compare but I can share my experience that I've gained in the past nearly 3 months of breastfeeding.

Initally, I spent HOURS researching "what is normal" while up in the wee hours of the morning feeding Liam. I found that a lot of my struggles were common, a lot of "common" views weren't exactly accurate, and breastfeeding isn't easy.  It's actually as far from easy as you can imagine. But with each ugly there is a good.  With each bad there is a good.  With each good, there is a wonderful.   To sum it all up with a simple phrase- "Just give it six weeks".  If you can get through the first 6 weeks, you've made it.

We'll start with The Ugly.
     Your nipples-
      They will be scabbed.  They may even have blood blisters on them.
     When you shower, even the water from the shower head will cause so much pain you reconsider ever taking a shower again.  
      The initial latch hurts like hell. Every time.  I reconsidered breast feeding every time Liam would cry to be fed.  I dreaded that latch.  It brought tears to my eyes.  Liam would latch, unlatch, and re-latch a dozen times in the beginning.  I may have yelled at him once or twice to figure it out.
      Everyone tells you to use Lanolin to help- what they don't tell you is that you'll have oily stains on your shirts, bras, and anything else that comes in contact with it.  If you don't use it, your nipples stick to your clothes and peeling them off isn't pleasant.

The Good?  This only lasts about 4-6 weeks.  The scabs go away, the stains become something to laugh at, and showers become your friend.  The latch stops hurting ad you and your baby figure each other out.  It becomes better.  It becomes wonderful.  It becomes a bond.

The Bad.
  I have 2 words- cluster feedings.  These are what makes mommas think they aren't producing enough milk to feed their children.  These feeding occur typically in the evenings, though they can be at anytime.  They occur around growth spurts, so 2 weeks, 4 weeks, 6 weeks, etc.  They exist to help stimulate increased milk production to help feed baby during these growth spurts.
In my experience here's what happened-  I'd feed Liam- he'd take his typical HOUR to eat.  Then 10-20  minutes later, he was crying and rooting for the breast again.  Back on the breast he'd go.  He'd eat again, and again, and again.  I can remember one day he was latched to the breast for 3 straight hours.  I couldn't believe it.  Thank goodness I had my Kindle Fire because I was researching away to make sure this was "normal".  Guess what?  It was.  It didn't mean there wasn't enough milk there- it just meant he was helping let my body know that soon he was going to need more.  I just needed patience (and nipples of steel would have been nice).

The good?  These feedings don't last forever.  The evening cluster feeds actually helped Liam sleep through the night by 6 weeks.  (He now sleeps 10+ hours at night).  The repeat feedings helped us learn to latch better. Liam now eats in under 20 minutes, both sides.  They increased my milk production.  Initially when I pumped I'd only get 2 ounces total from both breasts in 20 minutes.  Now I can get 5 ounces in about 10 minutes, just on one side.  Patience.  JUST GIVE IT SIX WEEKS.

The Good.
You're passing to your child immunity to illnesses.  You're decreasing their risk of asthma, allergies, eczema, ear infections, and even certain cancers.  You're developing a bond like no other.  Yes, mother's who formula feed have a bond too, I'm not discounting that, but  it's so hard to explain.  Breastfeeding a few weeks will make a difference.
Oh yes- and let's not forget the additional 500-800 calories a day you'll burn by breastfeeding!  I shed those 24 baby lbs in the first 6 weeks post partum without exercise.


I've now been breastfeeding for nearly 12 weeks- so I'm not an expert by any means but I really do encourage other mom's to give it a try.  Please ask if you have any questions.  I've even breastfed in public (in the doctor's office waiting room, at a wedding, in my car in a parking lot, and at the table in a restaurant!), and while that was a little panic inducing at first- not a single person said something to me or even looked at me wrong.

A great website and resource is http://kellymom.com/ .  I spent many an hour reading the information on there.

Postpartum working out and other identity crises

I started working out this month.  I realized that I was going to have to- I can't go from "i swallowed a watermelon-itis" (aka this:

)

 to "I can fit in my pre-pregnancy jeans!" without putting in some work.  But here's my dirty secret.  I haven't worked out since I fractured my ankle and had to have it surgically fixed 1.5 year ago.  My other dirty secret?  I gained 20 lbs that year!    After having Liam I lost all the baby weight within a few weeks.  I lost the weight, but what I didn't lose was flab and wider hips.  And I still have 20 lbs to lose from my "I broke my ankle so I can't workout but I sure can eat lot's of crap" year.

I started doing the "30 Day Shred" by Jillian Michaels.  It's tough but only 30 minutes in total so I can get the workout in while Liam sits in his bouncer.  I was so sore the first 2 days I could hardly lift Liam.  I am planning on working out 5-6 times a week and doing some extra ab work in there too.  I'd prefer not to have "dunlap" disease for ever.  (my stomach done laps over my jeans for those of you who are a little slow don't get "dunlap")

Sadly, I have great expectations that I'm not meeting.  I stepped on the scale after 3 WHOLE days of working out and no change.  Perhaps I will have to change my diet too?!  Gasp!

I also cut off all my hair.   I was having an identity crisis.  I wanted a new body but went ahead and got a new hair style instead.  I cut off 14 inches and donated it to "Locks of Love".  They make wigs for children under going cancer treatment.  Here's my new 'do.

2 months old

     My little Liam is 2 months old (9 weeks).  To celebrate he slept for about 10.5 hours straight- he only woke up because I was making LOTS of noise in the kitchen to "encourage" him to wake up.  ( I breastfeed- when he sleeps that long I suffer!)
   
    We went to his well child visit on his 2 month "birthday"- they celebrate that by giving him shots.  He got 3 pokes ( 4 vaccinations) and 1 oral vaccine.  I will admit, I cried.  I cried on the way to the doctors office because he was sitting in the back seat laughing and I felt so bad because he was so naive, innocent, and "unsuspecting".  He loves car rides and here I was taking him somewhere where they intended to inflict harm on him.   I cried in the office when he cried.  I'm such a sap.

     He did well- he only cried for a few minutes then stopped but for the rest of the day you could tell his little legs hurt him.  He didn't stand up as much as he usually does.

on the way to the pediatrician's office

  The next day we went to Aunt Jessica's house and took pictures.  Liam also got to "play" with his cousins.  Overall, he had a good "birthday".  

 

I survived....

I survived my first day away from Liam.  I cheated a bit though.  I was in a wedding this past weekend - which meant spending nearly all day away from Liam.  I was more than panicked.  I was going to have to pump throughout the day and my husband, mother-in-law, and sister-in-law were going to watch my baby.

The night prior to the wedding was the rehearsal so I got a little practice myself.  My husband attended it with me- it was about an hour drive- so we left around 6pm to get there at 7.  The rehearsal went well, then off to the dinner.  I had to pump in the car on the way to the dinner, but my wonderful husband bought me the car adapter for my pump so it was no big deal.  We got home around 11:30 or so and the baby was asleep already after taking a bottle.

The next day was the wedding.  I left Liam (in very capable hands) at 11:00 am.  We initially planned on staying the night near the wedding but to save money, we canceled the reservations and I planned on just driving home after the wedding.  The day went well- I had to pump in a room full of people I didn't know but  people were pretty understanding.  But, little by little I missed Liam more and more so I text messaged my husband a new plan!


He could drive out to the area where the wedding was with his mom and sister and most importantly, Liam. I  rationalized that Chase was my date and he would have to drive out to the wedding anyway and if his mom came earlier in the day we wouldn't have to worry about getting both Chase and I home after the wedding. I could just drive Chase and I home in my car.
Aaand-  That way I could feed Liam and see Liam and not go nuts.  Thankfully, and most graciously, his mom and sister agreed to my nutty plan.

I had to pump one more time in the car during the wedding because my dress was starting to not fit but overall- everything went well.  The wedding was beautiful and went off without a hitch!

And here are Liam's 8 week old pictures.  He will be 2 months old tomorrow.  I can't believe it!  I will take better pictures though!  I'm reading a book on how to take better pictures and my sister is going to teach me a few things.  So please forgive the horrible shadows and bad lighting!

8 weeks old!

My son is 8 weeks old.  8 weeks.  I don't know which is more amazing, the fact that I have a SON or the fact that we've both survived this long!

Liam is a wonderful baby.  We've only had a few days and nights where I cried when he cried but mostly, he's quiet and peaceful.  I can't believe I'm so lucky (knock on wood).

At 8 weeks old Liam is smiling and laughing.  He likes to look at himself in the mirror.  He likes to stand holding on to your fingers.  He will grab at your earrings, necklace, and/or hair.
He doesn't like to be held at your chest or cradled because he can't see what's going on in the world- he's curious and likes to look around.

At 8 weeks old I can count on him sleeping through the night.  He started this around 6 weeks old but that was hit or miss.  I can now be sure (again knock on wood) that when I put him down after his night time feeding ( whether it be 8, 9, or 10 o' clock pm) he won't be waking up until 4:30- 5:30 am.  I easily get 7- 8 hours of sleep.  After he wakes in the morning, he eats and goes back to bed until 7 or 8.

I can't believe how fast the time is going by.  I have to go back to work in 4 weeks.  I've cried.  I don't want to go back.  We have a wonderful lady to watch him when I do return to work but I'll miss so much. I don't want to go; but sometimes we have to do things we don't want to do. 

sporting his einstein- "Albert" by "Bum Genius" diaper

He likes to stand!

Daddy!~

Liam in photos

I love him.  I can't stop looking at him.  And since he's still sleeping I will let you look at him too!  Here's a post of mostly photos!

1 day old

one week old

2 weeks old

3 weeks old

1 month old

5 weeks

6 weeks

7 weeks

bath time

Authentic flight jacket- a gift from Papa Hogan.  It maaay  be a little big!

chillin' with Papa

I'm baa-aack- Labor story

So it's been a long while since I've "blogged".  From the last post the ironic? funny? thing is I went into labor later that night.  Goes to show that you never know when the baby is ready to come- only the baby knows.

Here's the story of my labor and delivery (for those of you who don't know or don't remember!):

Around 9 o'clock pm Wednesday the 25th I was laying on the couch watching "Masterchef" with Chase when I felt a little "leak".  I said- "oops I think I just peed myself" so I stood up to go to the bathroom.  No sooner than I stepped on the tile floor my water broke.  I'd describe it as it exploded.  I called Chase in and I was laughing hysterically.  I looked at him and said "Now what do we do?"

  I had intended on a "natural birth"- This meant laboring for hours at home until the contractions were so bad I had to go to the hospital.  But- I wasn't having contractions and my water was broken.  We called the Doctor and she said to come in straight away and get admitted.  Well, after a shower and packing and doing the dishes we headed in.

   They admitted me and checked me and I was still at 2cm.  They said if there was no progress then they'd induce at 6am.  I did not start contracting until about 4 that morning.  I had been pacing the floor and bouncing on a "labor ball" while Chase slept.  I was concerned I had little to no progress- and induction usually means "natural labor" is harder to do because the drug given to induce, pitocin, causes more painful contractions.  I was bummed but when they checked me at 6 am I was already 6cm.  I have to say that fortunately the pain was pretty tolerable at this point.  We moved rooms so I could labor in a tub and the labor continued.  (The tub did not help much to be honest).

    Overall, I think I did pretty well managing the pain. My husband would remind me to relax in between contractions and having my mom there gave me some extra support.  Thankfully, the nurse did not make me stay in bed hooked up to monitors because laying on my back made the contractions much worse. I had to get hooked up for 20 minutes here and there to get a good reading of contractions and the baby's heart rate but then I'd get unhooked and move to a more comfortable position.

 All was going wonderfully until I got to be about about 9 cm.  Then I got stuck.  An anterior lip of the cervix would not dilate and it was pressing against Sprout's head.  The nurse (who was a god-send) told me not to push because that could cause more swelling of the cervix and that can lead to a c-section.  Telling someone not to push and actually me not pushing was an entirely different thing.  Your body does what it wants to do, and mine wanted to push. 

Anyway after 2 hours of being stuck at 9 cm they finally convinced me to flip to my hands and knees like a dog to try to get that piece of the cervix out of the way.  The nurse basically wanted to push Spout back up the birth canal and move the piece of cervix behind his head.   (I have to say I was at this point begging for drugs, begging.   My Mom and Chase kept telling me that I didn't really want them and they wouldn't let the doctors give me any.)  The doctors suggested giving me a super low dose of demeral and phenergan (I kept thinking I was going to throw up) to help relax me a little for the "procedure".  This was my last hope before I was going to have to have some kind of major intervention (I feared laboring for 19 hours and having to have a c-section!).      Fortunately it worked!  The nurse was able to move the cervix out of the way and I was finally cleared to push.  And push I did.  For 2 hours!     

      At the beginning of all this I told them no episiotomy but once I hit the 2 hour pushing mark and the Doctor told me if she didn't do one, I was in for another 30 min- 1 hour of pushing.  I told her to do whatever it took to get that baby out!

    After 21.5 hours of labor (2 of those pushing) Sprout was finally born.  Chase was the one to tell me "It's a boy!" and I said " It's Liam!".  I was so happy but so exhausted.  I think I fell asleep a few minutes after they handed me Liam.  He was born at 6:45 pm on August 26.  He weighed 7 lbs 1.2 ounces and was 19.5 cm long.  He was perfect!

    Liam and I had instant skin to skin contact to help with bonding.  I also started breast feeding right away.  Everything was pretty much a blur but I do remember telling the doctor I could feel every stitch of the episiotomy repair- which meant when she did the episiotomy I probably wasn't numb but I was in so much pain I never felt it!

My recovery was surprisingly fast and easy.  I could have easily walked our new room but they took me by wheelchair.  I felt well enough to go home the next mornig but we had to stay another day because they did not count the 26th as a day because it was so late.

Liam's birth was amazing.  I'm super proud of myself for not having an epidural and I'd consider foregoing one again for the next baby but we will see when the time comes!

One week left? yeah right

I went to the doctor this AM.  There was "no progress" which isn't surprising because I haven't had any further contractions; that is until I left the Drs office.  LOL.  I've had a few contractions this afternoon but nothing really to write home about.  (I think it's because she was "messing around in there".  )
The doctor did tell me that if I go past the due date (which is very possible) she will induce on August 7th.  That's good because at least there is a set end in sight, but bad because an induction means pitocin, which means more painful contractions and more frequent contractions than "natural contractions", which means I probably will end up needing an epidural- which is not what I had planned.  So fingers crossed, Sprout decides to come in to the world prior to August 7th.
I'm fat and uncomfortable and looking forward to the end when I can finally meet this tiny being who's been playing soccer with my internal organs.

And here- if you want a good laugh- it's the most round belly ever!  (maybe not ever but it's pretty close to a perfect circle!)

HAHAHA

38 weeks... contracting?

The bathroom is now the room I spend the most time in.  Our water bill this month is up $15 from last month and I fully take on that blame.   I was up last night 9 (yes NINE) times to pee.  Ugh.  Yes- I've been told this is preparing me for "Sprout's" arrival- but then I also have people telling me "sleep now because you won't be sleeping later".  Well guess what?  I'm not sleeping now and even if I could it's not like I can store if for later.  Sorry I'm cranky cause I'm sleep deprived!

Anyway- we had an interesting week this week.  I had a Doctor's appointment on Wednesday.  I was feeling fine.  I left work at 1:00pm for my 1:45 appointment.  I got to the doctors and was having a little lower abdominal cramping.  The nurse roomed me and asked if I was having any problems- I told her about the cramping but explained that I felt I probably had to "poop".  She talked with me about stool softners and even using a suppository if needed ( I told her- uhhh heck no.  I will not be doing that thank you very much!) Well - while waiting for the doctor to come see me I started having some increased pain- kind of like a cramp but sharp at the same time.  Then it would go away.  Then it would come back.  After this happened a few times I also noted that during the pain my belly would get tight.  I started having hot flashes and some nausea with these pains.  Then I noted that the pains were timeable- about 6 minutes apart.

I still thought I just needed to poop ( I know, I know)!  The doctor came in around 2:15 right when I was having another pain (she may have laughed a little at me when I told her I didn't know what was going on) - she told me I was having a contraction.  Lucky me to have started this during a doctors appointment!  She "checked" me and I was 2 cm dilated and 50% effaced (a little TMI I know!).  She also said I could have a work note to go home and see what happens- suggesting I put my feet up and drink water- but I declined and went back to work.  Driving with the contractions was a little tricky but I managed.  I also called Chase 5-6 times in a row and he did not answer!  I did finally get a hold of him about 20 minutes later when I was back at work.  I told him if the contractions continued he'd have to come get me.  Fortunately (or unfortunately) the contractions slowed down and eventually stopped after I went home and had some dinner.  I haven't had any more notable contractions so it looks like Sprout is still settled in and has no intentions of coming out any time soon.


I think the contractions started because I was a bit dehydrated.  I was tired of getting up so much at night so I stopped drinking my daily GALLON of water and was only drinking about 40-50 ounces.  I'm back to around a gallon and no more contractions but more bathroom trips.

37 weeks- "full term"

I had a doctor's appointment this morning.  Everything seems to be going as expected.  Chase was able to come so he got to see Sprout on the ultrasound.  Spout is estimated to be 6 lbs and 10 ounces already.  It's thought that the baby will gain about 3 ounces/ week from here on out- so doing the math we'll have a 7lb+ baby easily.  (Though I've noted before U/S estimations are not exactly accurate).  Sprout was measuring right on at 37 weeks everywhere- except the head- THAT measured at 39 weeks.  EEK!  Unfortunately,  Sprout has no modesty and flashed the doctor his or her goods so the doctor now knows Sprout's sex.  She did not tell us what sex so hopefully she doesn't slip up and accidentally let us know in the next few weeks.
I had a lovely internal exam today as well.  I am 1cm dilated but 0% effaced.  Really- that means nothing women can be dilated to a 4 and not know and not go into labor for weeks, but everyone got excited for me at work so I thought I'd share that here too!
Oh yes- and guess who's a watermelon?

On a totally different subject:
I don't know who all were able to get this link but here it is- these are the pictures from the baby shower.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/hoganfamilybabyshower/.

I do have the disk with the photos on it so if there are any you want, just let me know and I can share them with you!

36 weeks 5 days

I'm over 36 weeks and on my way to 37 weeks which is considered a full term pregnancy.  At 37 weeks and after if you start contractions/labor Doctors will not do anything to stop you from delivering.  Prior to that you may receive meds to stop contractions.  It's a big milestone!  Sprout is moving around although I can tell there is less and less room "in there" because the movement are much more like (s)he's trying to break out or stretch.
A few days ago I would have said I've had no contractions at all, but I kinda over did it this weekend (what?  I needed to paint crown molding and shelves for Sprout's room!  That's important! ) and since yesterday I've been having lots of braxton- hicks.  I probably should have painted NOT in the sun.  And I probably should have taken more water breaks but I figure the contractions will lessen as I re-hydrate and stay cool.  Nothing to worry about!
I have a doctor's appointment on Wednesday morning.  We're having the last U/S that we will have this pregnancy.  Basically the point of this U/S is to make sure Sprout is head down and to get an idea as to how big Sprout is.  U/S weight estimations are notoriously inaccurate and may be off as much as a pound or two. I also will have an internal exam (oh joy) to see if I am dilated or effaced- though some women will walk around dilated 4 cm for weeks and weeks and really it means nothing.
I guess that's it for now.  I will post some pictures Wednesday? sometime.